Thursday, March 25, 2010

And the award for worst pun ever printed goes to...

The New York Post's own Larry Brooks, for referring to the Rangers tanking season resulting in a high draft pick as "turning a Sow's [sic] year into a silk purse."

1. Do not write an article advising that the team you cover should drop games to get a higher draft pick. Do not ever advise this as a strategy, or even imply that it is a positive thing to do. Do not do this. This is terrible. Certainly do not write a year's worth of articles about how the team should grow some pride and then write an article like that.

2. Turning a sow's year into a silk purse? Fucking...really? This is awful. You have added exactly one letter to an existing phrase, and you've really not created any interesting turns of phrase by doing it. What's the metaphor here, exactly? Our season was a piggy season, which can be turned into a silk purse the same way that same pig's ear can? This is an awful pun.

3. Why the shits did you capitalize "Sow"?

Aaaanyway, the Rangers beat the shit out of the Islanders last night, 5-0. Callahan played despite crashing into a behemoth named Zdeno over the weekend, and looked pretty okay. Prospal played his best game since his surgery, and Gaborik his best since the Olympics. Avery looked fucking fantastic, and I really, really like what I've been seeing from Brandon Prust. Dubinsky also had his best game in weeks. All helped Lundqvist deliver his third shutout of the season, and Torts had the good sense to reward his forwards with some ice time parity, with Gaborik, Drury, Callahan, Dubinsky, Prospal, and Avery all falling between 16:08 and 20:56.

So, all in all, this was a great night for the Rangers. I'd be excited, if any of it mattered. Not that I'm whiny about our place in the standings (five points and a game-in-hand out of contention): we deserve it. More that I'm thoroughly unconvinced that I will see the same team tonight in Newark. I have no reason to believe I won't see a less potent Gaborik, a less engaged Prospal and Dubinsky, and an early 3 goals against instead of for. I have no reason to believe that won't be followed by Torts panicking and giving his favorite three forwards of the night 12 minutes in the third. And so on.

9 games to go.


  1. So, you're really bent out of shape about Brooks' pathetic pun and random capitalization? (a) The season must really suck. (b) You're starting to sound a little like Torts.

  2. You're not really upset with the slap at integrity when you rail against Brooks' inference. You're just resigned to the fact that we would somehow fuck up the draft anyway. Like drafting Redden's nephew (if he has one). Or Al Montoya. Or Hugh Jessiman.